Since the topic this past week has been marriage, let’s look at a Saint who had a failed marriage, remarried, and ended up a canonized Saint anyway.
St. Fabiola is the patron Saint of difficult marriages, the divorced, victims of abuse and/or adultery, and widows. She herself was divorced, remarried, widowed, and a penitent. She founded the first Christian hospital in the world, financed numerous churches, and was renowned for her generosity to individuals and institutions. She died in 399.
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Yesterday was our 25th wedding anniversary! Today we are going away for the long weekend. It is the first time we have gone away alone together in fourteen years! Some couples can’t “get away” easily when they have children.
Usually at this time couples look back at their time together and affirm that staying together was not always easy. In our case, there were a couple of times we almost separated due to severe postpartum depression entering the marriage. Back then, it wasn’t recognized as a genuine medical problem. I say this to remind you that all forms of depression and bipolar conditions are a major cause of marital breakups. Good treatment supports staying together.
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Does one need to stay in an abusive relationship in order to be holy?
You have all heard the complaints that there are many Catholic canonized Saints that role model subservience and a willingness to endure physical and emotional abuse as a means of becoming holy. Today is the feast day of St. Rita of Cascia, Italy. Hers is a Sainthood that gives such an impression.
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I am honestly at a loss for words today. If you were to describe my mood it would be pensive. Yesterday I said good-bye to the last of the middle school students I see for counseling during the school year. This year is different because most of them are eighth graders and some I have worked with for all three of their middle school years. Then there is that undercurrent feeling that this may also be my last year at the “ghetto school of the northeast.”
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“Holiness is not perfection according to human criteria; it is not reserved for a small number of exceptional persons. It is for everyone; it is the Lord who brings us to holiness, when we are willing to collaborate in the salvation of the world for the glory of God, despite our sin and our sometimes rebellious temperament.”
What do these words by Pope John Paul II have to say to those who struggle with depression?
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The domain name here is expiring in June. The question has come up. Should I change this blog name from depressedandcatholic to depressionandcatholics? What do you think?
I totally forgot it was Mother’s Day this coming Sunday. Actually, I did remember a week or two ago when I got my own mother a card. I put the card on a shelf all proud for remembering so early, and then left it there. Lights and buzzers didn’t go off in my head until yesterday afternoon so my mother, who lives across the country from me, will probably get her card on Monday rather than Saturday! Yikes!
Our oldest son e-mailed Wednesday to say that he and some friends were going camping this weekend to celebrate the end of the college year. He probably forgot it was Mother’s Day too. Of course I said ‘no problem’ because as I said, I forgot. My husband also totally forgot. He didn’t even get his mother a card, but he’s exempt since he was away on business. Double yikes!
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We don’t question when we are depressed. We assume. We can assume we are wrong. We can assume we are not good enough. We can assume we are worms of sinfulness or faithless or lazy. We can assume we can do nothing right. We can assume others don’t understand us. Have I left anything out?
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“Lord, I am not worthy that you should enter under my roof but only say the word and my soul shall be healed.”
During every mass we say these words just before we receive communion. More than once I have been asked how this can be healthy for those who struggle with depression.
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